The LORD Is Near To The Brokenhearted And Saves Those Who Are Crushed In Spirit.

Psalm 34:18

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Rejection Hurts. 

It Really Does!

It Hurts Psychologically, Emotionally And Spiritually. 

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While physical pain is rarely involved, the pain is very real indeed, and may be far more damaging than any physical abuse. Rejection hurts most when we experience it from someone we depended on, trusted or even loved. Rejection is often used by those we are emotionally enmeshed with to manipulate and control us. While everyone fears rejection to some degree,  if we were a victim of
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that type of manipulative behavior as a
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child,
we will likely grow up with an exaggerated
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fear of rejection. 
This fear may become crippling to us emotionally and spiritually, and we may strive to avoid rejection from virtually anyone and everyone.  We thus become what is described in Scripture as a

“Man Fearer”,

and this is clearly identified as not pleasing to God and an impediment to our spiritual growth, maturity and joy. In considering the topic of rejection and its spiritual ramifications, we will first look at Scripture and see that God understands the pain of rejection to be real.  We will then seek what Scripture offers us to endure (yes!) But ultimately overcome it.

 

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Does God Understand Rejection? 

Has God Ever Experienced This Pain Of Rejection? 

Is It Even Possible For God To Experience That? 

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Well consider this conversation between God and the prophet Samuel recorded in I Samuel Chapter 8.  God had consistently declared to Israel His desire to be their King and for them to be His people.  The Israelites, however, became disenchanted with this and desired to be like the peoples around them and have a human king.  They went to Samuel and demanded this of him.  Samuel was very displeased and immediately prayed to God. 

This was the response he received, “The LORD said to Samuel,

 

“Listen to the voice of the people in regard to all that they say to you,

for they have not rejected you,

but

they have rejected Me from being king over them.”

I Samuel 8:7

 

It is clear from this passage that God experienced rejection, but did He feel its sting? 

His next statement to Samuel indicates that he did.

 

“Like all the deeds which they have done since the day that I brought them up from Egypt even to this day

–in that they have forsaken Me and served other gods

–so they are doing to you also.”

I Samuel 8:8

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Notice the word forsaken.

God felt forsaken!

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One dictionary definition of the word is

“to appear sad or lonely

because

one has felt deserted or abandoned”. 

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That’s How God Felt! 

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While this may be surprising to some and troublesome to others, the Scripture clearly tells us that there are certain attributes and characteristics that God and man share. Two of these are the ability to love and experience sorrow. 

The eleventh chapter of Hosea illustrates this!  In the eighth verse God declares

 

“How can I give you up, O Ephraim? 

How can I surrender you, O Israel?

How can I make you like Admah? 

How can I treat you like Zeboiim? 

My heart is turned over within Me,

All My compassions are kindled.” 

 

As Christians though, we have an even more compelling example of God experiencing rejection and its pain.  This is also one we can perhaps more fully relate to, since in this case God had become a man — the Lord Jesus Christ, the “God-man”! 

Isaiah prophesied this concerning Him

 

“He was despised and forsaken of men,

a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.”

Isaiah 53:3a

 

The apostle John tells us,

 He came to His own,

and those who were His own did not receive Him.”  

John 1:11

 

Jesus was rejected by His own people, those who He had come specifically to minister to and to save.

He (Jesus) answered and said,

 

“I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.”

Matthew 15:24

 

Of course the ultimate experience of rejection for Jesus was on the cross, where He took the penalty for our sins and was rejected by the Father!  About the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying,

 

”ELI, ELI, LAMA SABACHTHANI?”

that is,

“MY GOD, MY GOD, WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?”

Matthew 27:46

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This Was A True Cry Of Anguish,

And One That Was Feared, Yes Feared,

By Jesus As He Anticipated It In The Garden Of Gethsemane.

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We have substantiated from Scripture that God understands and has experienced rejection and its pain, and even the fear of it.  While this may be some comfort, we are probably still confronted with the reality of rejection and its pain in our lives.

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Does Scripture Offer Us Any Hope Or Direction In This Matter? 

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Consider the fact that the real problem for us is more likely the fear of rejection than rejection itself.  If we honestly assess the situation, we will probably realize that most of the people we fear may reject us are really not that significant to our lives, and the consequences of their potential rejection not that catastrophic. As President Roosevelt said to the American people in the depths of the depression,

 

“We Have Nothing To Fear But Fear Itself.” 

 

While that may not be entirely true in all cases, it certainly would seem to be in this one.  For many who struggle with the fear of rejection, it is actually one of their greatest fears. 

 

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It Is This Fear That Clearly Needs To Be Addressed. 

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Scripture has an answer for this as well.  The apostle John in His first epistle tells us that

 

“There is no fear in love;

but perfect love casts out fear,

because fear involves punishment,

and the one who fears is not perfected in love.”

I John 4:18

The word “perfect” in Scripture implies

“Completeness” Or “Fullness”. 

There is nothing left to add. 

So we see here that the antidote to fear is

“Perfect Love”,

but where and how can we obtain this antidote.

 

John helps us out again.

 

“We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. 

God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God,

and God abides in him.”

I John 4:16

 

Yes,

God’s Love Is

“Perfect”,

 

and if we go to Him He will pour that out on us. 

Jesus said

“ask and it will be given to you”

Matthew 7:7

 

and “all things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive”.

Matthew 21:22

 

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Have You Asked? 

Do You Believe? 

Do You Struggle With This? 

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On one occasion a man came to Jesus and asked Him to heal His son from debilitating seizures. 

Jesus said to Him

“All things are possible to him who believes.”

And the man responded

“I do believe;

help my unbelief.”

Mark 9:23-24

May this be your response as well!

 

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In summary consider what the Apostle Paul had to say to us in his epistle to the Romans.

 

 What then shall we say to these things?

If God is for us, who is against us?

He who did not spare His own Son,

but delivered Him over for us all,

how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?

 

Who will bring a charge against God’s elect?

God is the one who justifies (i.e. accepts);

who is the one who condemns (i.e. rejects)?

Christ Jesus is He who died,

yes,

rather who was raised,

who is at the right hand of God,

who also intercedes for us.

 

Who will separate us from the love of Christ?

 

Will tribulation,

or distress,

or persecution,

or famine,

or nakedness,

or peril,

or sword?

 

Just as it is written,

“For Your Sake

We Are Being Put To Death All Day Long;

We Were Consider As Sheep To Be Slaughtered.”

But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us.

For I am convinced that

neither death,

nor life,

nor angels,

nor principalities,

nor things present,

nor things to come,

nor powers,

nor height,

nor depth,

nor any other created thing,

will be able to separate us from the love of God,

which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” 

Romans 8

 

It seems in light of this discussion we might safely add

Nor The

Fear Of Rejection

Or The

Rejection Of Any Human Being.

 

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